Lonely (Why Am I So)

Just wrote this.

I have nothing anymore
I won’t chase it anyway
I’ll let it all find me
Is this why I’m lonely?

I had it once but I let it go
I tried to be warm but I left it cold
I’m a little too blinded to see
Is this why I’m lonely?

I say I know what I want
But I really, I really don’t
Every time the going gets good
I tend to find a retreat
Is this why I’m lonely?

I’ve found the sun
And I’ve found the moon
I’ve found your love
I’ve found some truth
But out of it all
Seems to grow a lie
And I need you to help me
Find my mind

So call my name
Bring a smile to my face
Let me see those dark eyes
May they keep me in line
I’m not so sure I want to stay
Lonely all the time

Bruce: 4/04/08 Sacramento, CA

April 4, 2008
Sacramento, California
ARCO Arena

All right, so I take a bus from Springfield to St. Louis, MO. I fly from there to Orange County. I had booked that flight before I knew I would attend Sacramento as well. I’m there for about two hours before flying to Sacramento where my friend Morgan picks me up. We were going to spend the wait before the lottery together, but she had to work at the last minute! Off to In n Out which we scarf down in the parking lot of Arco. Nice guy tells us where wristbands are being given out and while saying good bye to Morgan Greg and Lizzy show up. I get my ticket and get my wristband. Meet some cool people while hanging out. Finally meet Pauline, Andrew (officially), and so many others. You all know who you are! The community that Bruce brings together is quite amazing really. I cherish it. Ok, so lotto time I’m all lined up, the number is called, and I’m in. I end up second row in front of Stevie behind two pretty cool boys. They aren’t big fans but they seem to enjoy the music and get a lot of attention throughout the night.

Spirit in the Night won the radio contest, and has Charlie (!!) and Max open the show we all hear the beginning of the song. I was quite surprised. Ever since seeing the Hartford video all I can think is I wish I could see So Young and In Love open a show, but Spirit in the Night was in the same vein and quite a shock. I love this song regardless, but this night was extra special. One of those openers that makes me say I would be happy even if the band left after that. Anyway, Pauline was lucky enough to be in front of Bruce as he sat down on the stage and then nearly slid off the stage into her arms! Why wasn’t I in front? Nah, very happy for her. Bruce was clearly in a grand mood.

Radio Nowhere was great per usual and works well going right into No Surrender which is always dead on and great. Lonesome Day is just hot! The band is really pumped and on for this show. Gypsy Biker was really good. Magic was haunting, and I’ll have to say again I really like Soozie’s vocals on this.

Tour premiere of Murder Inc.!!! I nearly jump out of my shoes! I got the tour premiere of Lost in the Flood in Cincinnati and now Murder Inc. in Sacramento. This song is tied as one of my favorites, so I was psyched to hear it. It was amazing and all I expected. I’ve never heard it live before, obviously, but it was one of the best versions I’ve ever heard. Maybe I’m biased. Reason should have been next. I really missed hearing it especially if it came after Murder Inc. I can only imagine how fantastic that would have been. Although Candy’s Room is killer. I can’t complain I suppose.

Because The Night follows and is easily my favorite version I’ve heard live. Seriously Nils just goes off with the most astounding BTN solo, and he throws in a little riff that blows all other BTN solos away. I don’t know why he hasn’t sounded like this since, but it is as if one night he just wanted to vary the solo. I’m glad he did!

I might be getting tired of She’s The One, but I still enjoy it. Livin’ In The Future is a lot of fun and great as always and the same can be said for The Promised Land. Sherry Darling next and it continues to be fun as always. It’s funny that some of these “fun” songs might not rank as high on my list of favorite songs, but I would sometimes rather hear them live. Nothing like hearing either a barn burner of a song (i.e. Murder Inc.) or a fun song (i.e. Sherry Darling) live. It really sets the mood and allows people to just lose themselves in the songs.

Around this time Bruce spots the sign Lizzy and I bought because she had written “Clarence for President” on it. She was on the other side of the stage from me, so I didn’t recognize it was our sign at first. The sign spends the rest of the night onstage. We joke that Bruce owes us $4 for the sign. Backstreets comes next as a request it seems, and is one of the best versions I’ve heard. Afterwards we get the usual Devil’s, The Rising, Last to Die, Long Walk Home, and Badlands. As always let me praise Last To Die here. During Badlands I thought Stevie was pointing at the boys in front of me since I assumed every band member was looking at them when looking in my direction. We know kids get the love. Then Stevie points at me though and mouths “No, no. You!” and points at me. Ok, so I’ve been following him around and he notices. J

Girls In Their Summer Clothes opens the encore…unfortunately. I like it, but I’m just not so sure about hearing it live. A sign asking for Rosalita is seen, and the band go running into it. A lot of fun with great interaction between Bruce and Stevie. Without a moment to breathe BTR starts next and then Ramrod. I mean Sacramento is seriously loved by Bruce. One can tell with his demeanor and this setlist. The night closes with American Land, and as that drum beat starts up I’m sad the show is over but thrilled to hear AL. My first show was in Sacramento, and it was tremendous. This show did not change that.

Spirit In The Night
Radio Nowhere
No Surrender
Lonesome Day
Gypsy Biker
Magic
Murder Incorporated (Tour Premiere)
Candy's Room
Because The Night
She's The One
Livin' In The Future
The Promised Land
Sherry Darling
Backstreets
Devil's Arcade
The Rising
Last To Die
Long Walk Home
Badlands

Girls In Their Summer Clothes
Rosalita
Born To Run
Ramrod
American Land

Bruce: 3/24/08 Columbus, OH

March 24, 2008
Columbus, Ohio
Schottenstein Center

Four days and my final show of spring break. Of course by this point I know that I have four shows in California to look forward to! Lizzy gives me a call, so I head down to the lobby to wait for her. While there three people show up and sit down all the while talking about avatars and such. One person looked kind of familiar, so I was thinking they must post at Greasy Lake. Lizzy calls saying she is looking for the front, so I get up to head out. First I talk to the three, and I find out they are Bushy, PattyC, and VABossfan. Pretty cool to run into them. We talk a bit and I head out. The usual happens as we get our wristbands, go eat, and head back to the line. We are lucky enough to be on the rail on Stevie’s side!

The show opens with a predicted The Ties That Bind. No complaints as the song is great once again tonight. Afterwards I hear the opening chords of Radio Nowhere which always gets the place rockin’. Lonesome Day was as fun as always, but the first really hot song of the night is Adam Raised A Cain. My second time hearing the song I believe. Absolutely awesome as always. The guitar, the lyrics, the intensity were all there.

Gypsy Biker isn’t a favorite from the album, but I actually really enjoy hearing it live. Singing the last few lines is a lot of fun. So we get Adam and now Something in the Night! I’ll take the whole Darkness album, so no complaints from me. RTB per usual and I always hope he will never take the song out of the setlist. It’s needed. Well, I need it. Not sure about everyone else.

This night is going along really well because You’ll Be Comin’ Down was premiered! Great song from the new album, and I was wondering when the band would finally play it. Thankfully I was there to enjoy it. Lizzy was telling anyone that would listen that it hadn’t been played before. Lol

Because the Night was searing as usual thanks to Nils’ solo. I’m glad he gets to shine during that song. She’s The One I can get tired of, but I’m not going to say I don’t enjoy it live. I do. I just would like to see that spot mixed up a little. I also can’t clap the rhythm of this song and sing at the same time damn it!

Livin’ In The Future is one of those songs I can’t tired of. It must be because it and Last To Die are my favorites from Magic. The usual intro with needed applause. Yeah, I know it won’t change our country back to the way it was. Maybe it will give us some a kick in the butt. The Promised Land follows and always seems so relevant to sing. Maybe one day that last verse won’t mean so much and be so powerful, but I doubt it.

Right before Sherry Darling Bruce mentioned that it won the radio contest and he joked that Stevie was the one voting for it so many times. That got a few laughs, and the song was a lot of fun. Definitely something Stevie enjoys playing.

Andrew has been chasing this song, and I told him I’ll be in Columbus and we will get it. He should have been there because we did get it. All I could think is how lucky I am to hear some rare songs, but I can’t manage Darkness on the Edge of Town. Weird luck.

Devil’s, The Rising, Last to Die, Long Walk Home, and Badlands are no surprise. All great especially Long Walk to Badlands. I love singing Last to Die. This song just means a lot to me and Long Walk Home makes it the perfect 1-2 punch.

Girls… started the encore. I don’t mind this song. I mean I do like it. Maybe it’s because my mind can’t seem to remember more than 90% or so of the lyrics. I don’t know why. I’ve got the whole rubber ball smacks part down. Why can’t I remember more?!

BTR, Rosalita, Glory Days, and American Land were great song to end the night. Rosalita had Lisa pissed off at me some more. I can’t help it! I don’t tell Bruce what to play. J Glory Days isn’t a favorite, but it is always fun live and the majority know the song. American Land I will always argue should end every show except on special occasions or one-offs. If this song doesn’t get you singing and jumping…well, I don’t know what to say.

And the best thing about the end of the show? Lizzy and I make a sign that says “Garry Rocks.” She is holding it while I point at it like a maniac. Stevie goes up to Garry and motions that he paid us off. We all have a laugh over that. At the end of the song Garry grabs his pick and starts walking toward me! I never see him do this! I put out my hands like I’m begging for food, and he places his pick in my hand! Love it!

After the show I tried to find Marty, Bill, Tim, and Bob who I met earlier in the day. I met Bill before, but my first time to finally meet the others. Sure took long enough especially with Marty! We didn’t get to meet up, and I was on my way to the Greyhound bus station. I had to wait until 4:30 or so in the morning before getting on the bus for home. Spent the rest of spring break there with the thoughts of 3 great shows.

The Ties That Bind
Radio Nowhere
Lonesome Day
Adam Raised A Cain
Gypsy Biker
Something In The Night
Reason To Believe
You'll Be Comin' Down (Tour Premiere)
Because The Night
She's The One
Livin' In The Future
The Promised Land
Sherry Darling (Tour Premiere)
Incident On 57th Street
Devil's Arcade
The Rising
Last To Die
Long Walk Home
Badlands

Girls In Their Summer Clothes
Born To Run
Rosalita
Glory Days
American Land